I had always considered myself to be an indecisive person. When it came time for me to choose a college – I was totally paralyzed and overwhelmed by all the possibilities. When I’d go out to dinner with my family, I’d stress over the menu as if my life depended on my choice of meal that night. Which movie to see… which class to take… which neighborhood to live in… which career to choose… having to make decisions was WORK for me. I was not a fan.
As I’ve gotten a little older, I like to think that has changed a bit. I have much stronger ideas now of what I like and what I don’t like. I was actually extremely decisive with planning our wedding. I had a total vision for what I wanted – and am still surprised today at how little I stressed over all the details. I knew that I did not want to work in advertising sales anymore – and now I’m making my way in the worlds of photography and cheese (things I KNOW I love). When I go out to dinner, I still prefer coordinating the menu selection with whoever I’m dining with and ordering a few different dishes for everyone to share. That however, is not indecisiveness in my opinion. That is because it’s more fun to try more things!! If I HAVE to choose one dish I will. Luckily, Adam and many of my other friends humor me and enjoy eating that way too!
I bring this whole decisiveness topic up because of today’s photo of the day. Choosing a nail color – however unimportant of a decision it is – still always stresses me out! I sit there and obsess – looking over the hundreds of color options – each one varying from the one next to it by the slightest degree. I even try them out on my nails – until I have five different nails painted in five different colors. Then I usually end up choosing something I always choose. Like a pinky/nude color on my fingernails (so you can’t tell when they chip) and some version of red or purple on my toes. But always the obsessing. It’s rather silly.
My new theory (based on my thinking at this very moment), is that while many small inconsequential decisions are still annoying and sometimes difficult for me, I’m getting better making at the bigger ones… the ones that really count… the ones that are a true reflection of me. And that’s cool.